What a pointless fucking saying. Anyone can pretend to redefine themselves to feel better about however they've been fucking up, but the fact of the matter is that no one really puts forth any effort these days.
...myself included.
So that's why I have to hold myself accountable with this damn blog. because going back and reading that 2010 recap and my post from a few weeks ago is somewhat inspiring, oddly enough.
they show me how far I've come, and yet, I still haven't come too terribly far.
which is unfortunate. but Rome wasn't built in a day, and it's really fuckin fun to do bad things. Why stop?
LIMITS...
that's what I really need to learn, how to control myself and do the things that are actually important first. then party.
that's why this summer is so fucking crucial. and the end of this semester. I have to get serious about my life because it's racing past me, and has been for a little while now. somewhere in the vicinity of the past year or two.
WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?
oh yeah. Pissing away the time of my life that I'm supposed to be using to get better. to hone my skills. to give a big "fuck you" to everyone that's going to hate on me and what I'm trying to accomplish.
School.
Friends.
Love.
Life.
I don't think I've figured any of those things out. I still have so many questions. questions that can't be answered alone. but wtf am I supposed to do? I can't upset the status quo. pressure's always on me to make everyone happy. well...I've even lost all sense of reputation by this point because I've stopped giving a fuck. Not surprising, because I don't really give a fuck. But I need to be at least using this time to get something done.
I need to plan each day. and stick to it. damn it.
Oh well. I'll figure out this thing. Just can't ever be afraid to do me. period.
Love everyone. Unconditionally. Be awesome to each other.
(why is it so hard to remember that, all the time?)
No comments:
Post a Comment